Limitless

I liked the movie Blow. Johnny Depp brought a cool to the drug dealing industry that is rarely caught on film. Dazed and Confused was another great stoner flick, grabbing high school life by the balls and throwing it into society's face. Man, even The Godfather had its foot in the drug dealing camp. Refusing to sell drugs on the street is what got Don Corleone shot in the first place. However, I have discovered a new movie that ushers in a new regime of drug flickers: Limitless. What's so great about this druggy movie is that the drug is beneficial not only to the user, but the rest of society as well. You see, cocaine and E have gained such bad notoriety because their uses kill. They caught a real tough break.

Limitless is the story of failing writer Eddie Morra (Bradley Cooper) and his recreational use of a secret drug that alters his entire train of thought. The drug allows him to use 100% of his brain and anticipate different things. Throughout the film, the audience is introduced to characters that test Eddie's wits and logic as he tries to figure out how to fully utilize his new found glory.

Limitless is a cautionary tale gone astray. On one hand, this is a film about a drug that is addictive because of its main purpose: ultimate perfection in everything. On the other hand, the drug is not crippling, but rather empowering. In times like these when everyone wants to feel secure in everything they do, a sense of possibility and understanding is wanted. The drug in the film gives its user that feeling. Usually, a drug movie vilifies the drug, but in here it is being glorified.

Keep in mind, I sat through this movie with a bunch of friends from school. Story wise, the film was outstanding and everything was very easy to follow. Even though much of the dialogue was spoken in wall street financial lingo and power broker money talk, the meaning was clearly stated. But from a cinematic standpoint, enjoying shots and angles is difficult when people are asking stupid questions or sending text messages. There was one re-occurring shot where the streets of New York City would shoot out into a never ending tunnel and all I could hear was the nauseous moans of my friends. And then whenever there was a sex scene, the woot woots came howling.

I can't totally blame my friends for me missing half the film. I totally missed the meaning of the ending because I was flirting with the dangerously fiery redhead to my left. Limitless is in fact a drug movie, but it is also a success story. It's also a film about corporate greed, self interest, and survival of the fittest. Get ready for the cheesiness, but I guess the morals of this movie are Limitless as well. Shout out to Josh and Bryce and Boyd and Brooke and Ally and Jenny and Hayley and Zach. Yeah, I think that's everyone

Green Street Hooligans

I have been in Ecuador for the last 12 days so there has been quite a rift in my writing. I'm sure you were all eagerly awaiting my next clever movie review while I was munching on smoked Guinea Pig and worms. However, while you were all sleeping in your warm, comfy beds, I was going toe to toe with cockroaches they size of my ear and moths larger then most kittens. I'm in somewhat of an international mood and therefore have decided that my first post back will be about a movie not made in the US, but rather abroad. This movie is so far away....England. Yeah, yeah, so it's in English...big whoop. England is still different then America and therefore not as great. They call cigarettes fags, prostitutes wenches, and have poor dental hygiene...literally all of them. This movie, of course, is Green Street Hooligans.

Green Street Hooligans takes place in "football" infatuated London. Matt Buckner (Elijiah Wood) is wrongfully accused of drug use at Harvard University and is expelled. He runs away to London to stay with his sister who has married an British national. Once Matt meets Pete Dunham (Charlie Hunnam), his brother-in-law's brother, the two begin a friendship that shakes the foundations of Pete's "football firm" or gang.

I saw this movie and just wanted to start punching, just go into a crowded public area and yell out like Jackie Moon, "Somebody hit someone!" Essentially, GSH teaches its viewers the upside of violent street fighting, as long as its for a cause like keeping the reputation of a soccer team that has never done anything to benefit you, then you are golden. Elijiah Wood just reeks of wimpiness. The whole point of the movie is to show the different fights that the "firms" get into before and after matches and the rivalries that explode. I'm sorry, but Frodo Baggins just doesn't fit the criteria of Hooligan. In GSH, his words are soft and delicate. He has the voice of a baby and when he is trying to intimidate his enemies, he just sounds like a girl. I could even kick the shit out of him.

But Elijiah does not destroy the movie, in fact, his pussification only propels the movie forwards. At times, it's almost comical to see him in fights. Charlie Hunnam does a fantastic job at developing a true football fanatic. He freaks out when the Yank calls it soccer, offers up his seat to a lady on the Underground, and teaches football to kids at school. All in all, the English are pretty versatile people. His screen presence is dominating, but not overpowering. You understand his leadership role within the firm, but he doesn't hog anything. He is valiant till the end and distinguishes between loyalty to friends and firm.

GSH is kind of like The Longest Yard, but not really. Actually the only similarity lies in the fighting. And even then, GSH has all of its fights take place outside of the field. I rescind my last comment, GSH and The Longest Yard have nothing in common. I would erase this whole thing, but I feel that would just be demoralizing to me. In GSH, intimidation of perseverance through strength means power. A fist is far more powerful then words, especially if most of the words are camouflaged beneath heavy English accents. Green Street Hooligans is a sports, international, and drama all wrapped into one giant burrito of fun. Except this burrito is kind of damp and sticky like many of London's streets.

Heckler

There is an extreme chance that you haven't seen this film. A portion of that chance may be from the fact that is a documentary. While informative and usually a good mind stimulant, documentaries are a dying breed. I, personally, enjoy the doc because of its willingness to dive into issues. It is a movie genre that isn't afraid to make a fool of itself and almost wants to make every situation as awkward and uncomfortable as possible. The documentary has also transformed whoever is making the film into a world authority on the matter. Suddenly, every Tom Dick and Harry thinks they are the leading source on whale migration in the Arctic Ocean or an increase in AIDS cats in the deep South. Documentaries give their filmmakers a sense of pride, one that probably wouldn't be achieved if they wanted to write a book or something. Who reads anyways?

Heckler is Jamie Kennedy's attempt to examine the psychology of the critic and the heckler. Leading experts in the field, otherwise known as comedians, explain personal experiences with hecklers and critics and try to debunk the villainous truth behind bad reviews. Essentially, it is an hour and eighteen minutes of every comedian ever seen on Comedy Central repeating each other, "Hecklers want to get their voice heard, Bloggers want to attack the people on top!"

At times in this doc, I felt genuinely bad for these performers. Here you have people going on stage in front of people they have never met before, just trying their hardest to get people to laugh. When nobody laughs, the negativity comes out. Come on, audience, it's not like the comedian can read everybody's mind to see what they find funny. Cut the guy a little friggin slack. Also, you don't have this comedian coming to your work and telling you how pitiful of a garbage man you are or how awful your copy pressing fingers look. Jesus Christ, people, have a little sympathy.

With that being said, Jaime and all his comedian friends, grow the fuck up. Boo hoo, a critic slammed your movie because it wasn't funny or it wasn't intelligent. I'm pretty sure you are still walking home with a paycheck larger then most McDonalds employees go home with after a year. So your movie didn't reach out to every single person in the audience; in the perspective of things, I bet you made a couple of people laugh or cry. So if anything, it's a double whammy for you: not only did you entertain some people, you also are making more money then Juan from the gas station and his entire family combined. You may make the argument that it's not always about the money, it's about doing what I love. Well that's very noble and all, so why don't you start charging free admission for comedy shows or stop bashing the economy in every set you have.

It's strange, Kennedy talks about people just like me in Heckler. He says we are fat, white, nerdy, and smelly. While that may be true for most bloggers, it is not for me so suck it. A number of the comedians interviewed say the same thing, absolute dipshits are bloggers. Ok, so why are you caring so much what we write then. Of the millions of blogs and review sites in this gigantic world, what the hell makes you think that the person who is deciding between your next movie or someone elses is going to consult my site first?

We love to attack the guys on top. It's true, we get jealous and it forces us to break others down. That's human nature, just as performing and taking home giant checks without thinking twice is human nature. So what it really comes down to is we both enjoy what we do, you make money, enough money in two weeks that would put our lives to shame while we write reviews that bash you that will probably never be read. Let's see who has the advantage, chances are nobody will ever know that this existed. Sorry Jaime, I loved you in Malibu's Most Wanted.

The Toy Story Trilogy

I must say that was not the best Academy Awards I have ever seen. Anne Hathaway seemed more like the cool babysitter you might be lucky enough to get when you are seven, but James Franco just stood there like an idiot. He closed his eyes halfway whenever he spoke, and his jokes were not nearly close enough to Funny Or Die material. While I should be blaming these lifeless robots for a poor showing on TV, I actually must blame ABC for their terrible performance. ABC had been building up this award show for the last several weeks and it turns out the commercials were funnier then the show itself. That's what happened with The Expendables, awful film. Anywho, in honor of the night's most respected recipient, Randy Newman, I present you with a review of the Toy Story 3 trilogy: The Abridged Version. (Not a chance in hell I'm spending 3 hours to review each movie individually).

The Toy Story series follows Woody and Buzz, two talking toys, who go on a series of wild adventures, all in the name of their owner Andy. Throughout the series, we are introduced to characters like Mr. Potato Head (Don Rickles), Slinky (Blake Clark), Hamm (John Ratzenberger), and Jessie (Joan Cusack).

In the first Toy Story, Woody (Tom Hanks), Andy's most beloved toy is jealous of the new toy, Buzz Lightyear (Tim Allen). In an act of jealousy, Woody fakes Buzz's death to regain Andy's affection, but in the end becomes best friends with Buzz. The first movie definitely tried to emphasise the friendship piece, but not just with Buzz and Woody. The relationship between Andy and his toys are just as strong.

In the second film, we are introduced to Jessie. Woody finds out he is a collectors item and is mistakenly given to a collector. Woody realizes just how much he needs his family of toys, so I think the main message of this film was appreciating what you have.

The third installment finds Andy going off to college and contemplating giving his toys away, hmphh some friend. The toys get taken to a nursery home where they believe they will be played with carefully, but they find the children to be little devils. Totally put me off from wanting to have kids for a good four months. By far the most badass of all the films, this one ends in a real cliffhanger, actually everything gets sorted out so there isn't much of a cliff or a hanger. Purpose is by far the dominating theme in this film.

If Pixar animated films was a crime syndicate, Toy Story would be the Godfather. This is pretty much the movie that started a revolution of Pixar movies. It also started a generation of terrified children who believed their toys came to live after they left for school. I was one of them, but I thought they wanted to kill me like Chucky cause I never picked them up. I thought I was like Andy, but if I was a toy I would hate me too. I used to leave Lego's outside in the winter and wait for the snow to melt to find them. Obviously I'm no Sid, but that's pretty brutal.

The Toy Story Saga also gave us some pretty classic friendship tunes, compliments of my boy and newly awarded Oscar winner Randy Newman. I always felt like Randy was the kind of musician that everyone else in entertainment never took seriously until he started doing big things, like Rain Man. Randy Newman is like Rain Man. "You've Got a Friend in Me" is to this day my favorite movie song ever. Newman is so simple with his lyrics, but he gives such a punch. Forget that he sounds like one of the bosses from Star Fox, the man is a musical genius. But seriously, I think every animated movie has a song by Ra-New.

I grew up with Toy Story. It's been apart of my life and taught me to never neglect my roots. That's what Toy Story really is trying to tell us; we have our new connections and our computers and cell phones, but let's just remember the days when everything was simple and our toys were our best friends. And then Facebook came.

Oscar Special

It is one of the most wondrous nights of the year. Some say Oscar night is comparable to a Bar Mitzvah party or wedding night. My BM theme was army/navy, but I can see how the two correlate. Anyway, movie season this year was not at its finest point but there have been a few standout performances that I think deserve the Oscar nod over others. Without further adeu, let us dive into the sea of exposed cleavage and thin neckties that is the Academy Awards.

Original Screenplay: Inception has to take this baby home. I was mind fucked by the intricate plot. If a movie about two lesbian mothers beats out this kick ass neurological punchbag of a movie, I will be shocked.

Best Animated Film: Toy Story 3. In the history of animated films, Toy Story is the Jesus Christ of animated films. Praise it

Adapted Screenplay: The Social Network. Sorkin gave Zuck personality, nuff said.

Visual Effects: Inception will grab this one for sure. The movie takes place in a dream world for gods sake! I saw an entire city block roll into a wall in this movie. If that's what someones normal dream looked like, I'd hate to see what a wet dream looks like.

Sound Mixing/Editing: I can't really tell what the difference is between the two, but they are separate categories. For the sake of efficiency, I'm going to say Inception gets this one. Lots of horns and what sounded like chairs being dragged going on in this film.

Original Song: I'm giving this one to Randy Newman and his song We Belong Together from Toy Story 3. Randy knows how to make a beat and even though he may not be taken seriously by most film composers, the dude has been around the block. How many songwriters do you know that have the balls to say "short people got no reason to live"? Quick sidenote, Inception will get best score-Hans Zimmer

Film Editing: I have to say, The Fighter will win this. I never truly understood how important film editing was until I read a review of a particular scene in this movie. It is in the beginning when we first see Christian Bale in his drug den. The scene is a masterpiece of archive footage of boxing matches and shots with Bale. It's fabulous and that scene could seal the deal for The Fighter.

Director: David Fincher. He gave Zuck personality, nuff said.

Best Supporting Actor: Christian Bale hands down. Some say Geoffrey Rush, but Bale put so much of his life into this role. Starving himself, perfecting that Lowell accent, really giving it his all. Bale better get this or the Academy is going to have some serious problems.

Best Supporting Actress: Melissa Leo. What Leo did on screen for Lowell women will be forever immortalized in her scene where she sends her daughters out to beat up Amy Adams. That's what a real mother does for her son, sends out the goons.

Best Actress: Natalie Portman. I haven't seen Black Swan, but I really want to see Your Highness and I think if she is half as smokin hot in that as she is in Your Highness, she's got it.

Best Actor: Colin Firth. He's pretty fantastic. Nailed the stutter, is the model Englishman. I want to see him get this Oscar pretty badly.

Best Film: While I would love to see Hollywood East take home the gold for The Fighter, I think The Social Network has this one. It brought personality to Zuck, nuff said.

The Oscars are starting soon, I must grab my seat next to Brad and Angelina. That was a joke, I'm home.

The Pursuit of Happyness

I'm not usually a fan of movies that don't have proper titles, but in this case I make an exception. The Pursuit of Happyness is an excellent film that shows its audience how important money really is in America. Seriously, from watching this movie I learned that I should never be without money. Yeah, family and love is all nice and happy, but The Pursuit of Happyness taught me money is the only way to survive out in the world. With that being said, watching this movie makes me feel lucky and guilty at the same time. But this guy, Chris Gardner the main character, probably has more money then he knows what to do with so I think I can rest easy.

In this film, we find single father Chris Gardner (Will Smith) trying to piece his life back together and get job all the while trying to raise his young son Christopher (Jaden Smith). Chris is broke for most of the film and we find him and his son running from shelter to shelter while Chris manages a lucrative internship at a brokerage firm.

Real life father and son Will and Jaden Smith give this film the on screen chemistry needed for a movie of this magnitude. The majority of the film is their interaction with one another so a concrete relationship is crucial. Both Will and Jaden bring, what I am assuming to be, a healthy relationship outside of work into this movie. Every hug is filled with intensity and every shot of holding hands is powerful. Will gives a performance of a lifetime. His character speaks out to not just fathers, but any person who has stood up and taken ownership of something. Jaden is just cute as hell. He's probably also the luckiest kid in Hollywood. If my Dad was the Fresh Prince, I'd strut my stuff up and down Rodeo drive.

The Pursuit of Happyness has a few scenes that stick out in my mind. First and foremost is bathroom scene in the subway station. Chris and his son have been locked out of their motel room and are forced to seek shelter in a dirty subway bathroom. Chris camouflages the disgrace of this act by telling his son they are going back in time and he must imagine the bathroom to be a cave. For the next thirty seconds, we find Chris, with his son asleep on his lap, holding back tears as people begin knocking on the bathroom door to get in. Your heart just gets ripped out because you feel for how low this man has gone. The second most important scene in this film is when Chris finally fixes his bone density scanner. After weeks of fiddling around with it, the light turns on an illuminates the shelter. Probably the most symbolic scene in the film, there is a light at the end of the dark, homeless, dirty tunnel. The scene speaks for itself, quite frankly. Finally, there is Chris's job offer. He has been working for weeks trying to land this job and it is finally given to him. Will Smith does this facial expression when he tries to hold back tears but his lips curl up. It's powerful stuff, man. And it is by far the most feel good scene in the movie. The man has seen everything terrible and he is finally being rewarded for his heroic actions.

I liked this movie. It really makes you feel as if you can achieve anything when you are poor and homeless. It's an inspirational film to say the least. What if every homeless person in America saw this film? There you go America, I just solved the homeless problem. I'm assuming that those of you who read this blog have money; you haven't spent it all on Brazzers passwords or Ding Dongs. Be happy with what you have people. Be happy that you didn't have to sleep in bathrooms or wrestle doped up homeless men for a spot in the shelter. However, be kind of down in the dumps because you are not Will Smith's son. Sorry this wasn't a review of Kid Cudi's song.

Youth in Revolt

Get some much needed sleep or write a review?Hesitantly, I will pick the latter. I make myself write one review every day, give the people what they want! I want to make movies when I get older. I want to write, direct, produce, edit, the whole nine yards. When I direct, I want my actors to make choices that leave a lasting imprint on the audience. When I edit, I want my movies to flow and have scenes sync perfectly with one another. If I ever produce, I want directors to come begging me for production money, offering me their wives and first born children. Most importantly, when I write, I want to create characters that are truly unlike anyone in the known world. I want their dialogue to be smart and funny and quirky and unique. And every time I try to sit down in front of my computer to type up a new screenplay, my mind goes blank and I try in vain to come up with clever lines. Youth in Revolt was like one giant slap in the face to me because it seemed as if every line personified cleverness. Literally, the moment Michael Cera talks, my jaw dropped four inches and you could fit golf balls in my cheeks.

Youth in Revolt is the story of 16 year old Nick Twisp (Michael Cera who will forever look like a 14 year old) and his attempts to fight for the girl he loves, Sheeni (Portia Doubleday). Along the way, Nick invents an alter ego, Francois, who forces Nick to do evil deeds like burn down half of Berkeley, CA, or destroy both of his parents' cars.

Youth is a cool movie because of how intelligent Sheeni and Nick sound in contrast with the rest of the characters. They are two lovers who are meant to be together, but they come from un-educated and ill-informed families who care very little for love or any other human emotion. The fight to block out these obstacles and remain with each other is what makes for such an entertaining film. Twisp is a confident character who enjoys Sinatra, journaling, and shrooms. In his world, nobody is like him so when he meets Sheeni he tries to do whatever it takes to be with her. Sheeni is the same; a lover of french and french music. She is incredibly forward and extremely flirtatious. I believe that is what makes this such an appealing film to, well the title says it all, youth. There is an odd chemistry between Nick and Sheeni, one that reverts back to man's primitive nature and raw tendencies. Nick finds the need to constantly express his undying love for Sheeni. These two just have to be together and it's evident in both the dialogue and their stage direction.

Dialogue pushes this movie past all pre conceived boundaries. Nick and Sheeni speak with a certain affect. Whether it's Nick commenting on the dog he has bought for Sheeni or Sheeni describing her happiness at attending a French speaking school, these characters bring a high intelligence to their speech. At the same time, the frankness of Nick's alter ego, Francois, is blunt and hysterical. Whereas Nick tries to think through his actions, Francois makes a matter-of-fact statement and continues with his day. Again, their is an action and counteraction of personalities that resonate well in the movie.

Youth in Revolt is a comedy. It will make you laugh if you see it. I just can't comprehend how every line was written to be so damn intelligently funny. Perhaps it's Michael Cera's angel like vocals? Either way, Youth in Revolt was a pleasant surprise for me. I was expecting a school massacre or something involving kids vs adults, but what I got was quick wit and fast humor. So yeah, sleeping or watching this movie. Movie seemed like a good choice tonight. But milk was a bad choice!