Oscar Special

It is one of the most wondrous nights of the year. Some say Oscar night is comparable to a Bar Mitzvah party or wedding night. My BM theme was army/navy, but I can see how the two correlate. Anyway, movie season this year was not at its finest point but there have been a few standout performances that I think deserve the Oscar nod over others. Without further adeu, let us dive into the sea of exposed cleavage and thin neckties that is the Academy Awards.

Original Screenplay: Inception has to take this baby home. I was mind fucked by the intricate plot. If a movie about two lesbian mothers beats out this kick ass neurological punchbag of a movie, I will be shocked.

Best Animated Film: Toy Story 3. In the history of animated films, Toy Story is the Jesus Christ of animated films. Praise it

Adapted Screenplay: The Social Network. Sorkin gave Zuck personality, nuff said.

Visual Effects: Inception will grab this one for sure. The movie takes place in a dream world for gods sake! I saw an entire city block roll into a wall in this movie. If that's what someones normal dream looked like, I'd hate to see what a wet dream looks like.

Sound Mixing/Editing: I can't really tell what the difference is between the two, but they are separate categories. For the sake of efficiency, I'm going to say Inception gets this one. Lots of horns and what sounded like chairs being dragged going on in this film.

Original Song: I'm giving this one to Randy Newman and his song We Belong Together from Toy Story 3. Randy knows how to make a beat and even though he may not be taken seriously by most film composers, the dude has been around the block. How many songwriters do you know that have the balls to say "short people got no reason to live"? Quick sidenote, Inception will get best score-Hans Zimmer

Film Editing: I have to say, The Fighter will win this. I never truly understood how important film editing was until I read a review of a particular scene in this movie. It is in the beginning when we first see Christian Bale in his drug den. The scene is a masterpiece of archive footage of boxing matches and shots with Bale. It's fabulous and that scene could seal the deal for The Fighter.

Director: David Fincher. He gave Zuck personality, nuff said.

Best Supporting Actor: Christian Bale hands down. Some say Geoffrey Rush, but Bale put so much of his life into this role. Starving himself, perfecting that Lowell accent, really giving it his all. Bale better get this or the Academy is going to have some serious problems.

Best Supporting Actress: Melissa Leo. What Leo did on screen for Lowell women will be forever immortalized in her scene where she sends her daughters out to beat up Amy Adams. That's what a real mother does for her son, sends out the goons.

Best Actress: Natalie Portman. I haven't seen Black Swan, but I really want to see Your Highness and I think if she is half as smokin hot in that as she is in Your Highness, she's got it.

Best Actor: Colin Firth. He's pretty fantastic. Nailed the stutter, is the model Englishman. I want to see him get this Oscar pretty badly.

Best Film: While I would love to see Hollywood East take home the gold for The Fighter, I think The Social Network has this one. It brought personality to Zuck, nuff said.

The Oscars are starting soon, I must grab my seat next to Brad and Angelina. That was a joke, I'm home.